Showing posts with label creativity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label creativity. Show all posts

18 October 2009

Breaking the Seal (or, "Oh, How I Miss thee, Blog")...

A SAD result of writing and picarooning -- for a living -- is that the writing I do, writing some would see as frivolous, is rarely given the attention I believe it deserves. I'm not suggesting that my extracurricular writing here (or elsewhere for that matter) is ever simply "fun." No, indeed, my (ahem) free-time* writing serves multiple purposes: it allows my creative side to flourish! I find communion with fellow writers! I keep my mind and my pen nimble for the benefit of my students! I am forced to remember that writing does not happen in a vacuum and that vacuuming rarely trumps the need to write.**

Nevertheless, one has to actually WRITE in order to gain said benefits.

New leaf, I turn thee here and now. Seal? Thou art broken.

In the cause,

Dr. T Shandy

*I use the term "free time" loosely. I, like most of you, rarely have any time that does not cost me dearly.

**In the quest for absolute transparancy, I must admit that I found myself vacuuming this weekend in, I was delighted to discover, a ridiculous attempt to avoid writing! The excessive stress and never-ending pressure of numerous writing deadlines has forced me into wonderfully productive "old habits" (of both writing and cleaning, I am proud to report).

04 April 2009

Dr. Shandy Calling*

ON GOOGLE did our Dr. Shandy
A lusty pleasure-blog decree:
Where Words, like sacred rivers, ran,
Through revelations [man measuring man]—
Twittered down for all to see.

Yes, twice three posts on risky ground
Were memories and facts muddled round:
And the Objects -- rich with old school rills,

Blossomed into an opera the world would see;
O
ur hometown? [Backwards as the hills!],
U
nfolding intersections, most colorful tapestry.

But, oh! that mean professional chasm which planted,
‘Round her ivory tower, a tainted theorist’s cover!
A savage place! as evilly enchanted
As e'er beneath that mountainside was haunted
By woman wailing for log ago dissertation-advisor!
And from this chasm, with senseless academic seething,
As if this campus in entitled patriarchy were breathing,
A mighty creativity potently was forced:
Amid whose online half-Internet’d burst
Huge ideas vaulted like reclaimed mail,
Or like a Floridian’s ‘flock o’seagulls’ flail:
And 'mid these frantic emails, at once and ever,
It flung up [humbly] some sacred words.
Rhetoric meandering with a lazy motion;
Through mountains and swamps the sacred ideas ran,
Then reached their blogs -- those measured man by man,
And soon left in anonymity – lost inside a lifeless Web:
Then, 'mid this tumult, Shandy had an epiphany:
Intersecting voices? A private polyphony!

The value of the blog of pleasure?
Creativity as it flowed from fountains!
Where she wrote their mingled measure,
From the swamps to the mountains.
‘Twas was a miracle of rare device,
A witty pleasure-blog: ‘twould suffice!

A lawyer with a blog
In a vision once I saw:
It was an complex experiment:
A wayward career he’d supplement --
Writing from the Life he'd Lived.
Would that it would renew within me,
[A world left far away and oh, so long!],
To such a deep delight 'twould win me?
That technology offered a lost song,
But, could I create a blog from air?
Those witty words! A new rhetorical device!
That all who heard should read it there,
And all would cry, “Bravo! Bravo!
Her brilliant stance, her willingness to dare!”
I’ll w
eave my tapestry 'round you thrice,
You’ll close your eyes -- no longer dread,
On Shandy's life blood now be fed
And, I hope, enjoy my corner of Paradise.

-- Dr. T. Shandy (In the Cause!)


*Originally composed while visiting Xanadu; Coleridge's -- not Olivia Newton John's.



01 April 2009

What the Gods Hath Laid Before Us...

IN THE TOWN where my father and my mother dwelt, dwelt also a tall, upright, intelligent, wryly notable, good body of a young man, who, with the help of a little plain good sense, and some years full employment in the business of academic success (in which he had all along trusted little to his own efforts, and a great deal to those of fate’s fickle finger -- pray, the pointing digit, not that of his bastard middle brother), -- he had acquired, in his way, no small degree of reputation among his peers in the convoluted world of high school; -- by which with the word world, need I inform you, kind reader, that I mean no more of it than a small circle described upon the circle of the great world, of four East Texas miles diameter, or there- abouts, of which the high school, where the good young man lived, is supposed to be the centre.

In addition to his scholarly pursuits, this young man (we will, henceforth, call him BF – for wont of a more respectable “pseudonym”) had been gifted, it seems, with a modicum of talent for music-making, and so with four of his peers, BF sought out a career in the industry – and, despite the localized limitations of musical success, girls did swoon at his skillful stroking of the bass, though a few others did perhaps see young BF in a different light – not as an object of adoration, but as a fellow scholar, a witty young man with promise, potential, and it should not be ignored, a fairly passable backside (“she” was but sixteen, I should remind you; and as such, her passions were often purely aesthetic -- as changeable and unpredictable as the Red River itself).

Despite my flighty passions of 'lo those many years ago (and more recent tendency to speak of myself in the third person), I am, dear reader, this same "she." To be clear, I was at that time a person of decent carriage, -- serious scholarly deportment, ---- yet a woman fond of words, a thespian, a word-smithing pugilist, if you will; oh! I was a writer. And, even at sixteen, I found, in some small degree, a kindred spirit in young BF: he was a lover of music – yes, a performer in all things -- if even, more often than not, of the more reluctant sort.

Years did pass; lives were made, and new lives were forged, as we sped from decade to decade; and though my friendly high school acquaintanceship with BF lasted no longer than t’would take the ink on our diplomas to dry, I must admit that I did not forget that young man – my young BF! -- so full of youthful promise! – what potential for future greatness! Nor he I. Yet each of us had said “fare-the-well” and moved on to adulthood in the most expected tradition of college-bound teens…

These last words, you must know, fall quite short of summarizing the complicated, transitional years that would pass before our next introduction; –
to be sure, nearly two decades would come and go before I would hear what became of my ‘ole friend, BF. But then – in a single and most unexpected coincidence [though I am, admittedly, uncomfortable with the assigning of such random credit to corners unknown] BF was placed squarely back into my life – both of us immediately aware that the other was older, wiser -- older. In the interim, it was clear – without a single word passing betwixt us – that neither of our lives had run according to the old form from which such middle-class licenses, faculties, and powers-that-be usually mandated.

It was the 10th day of the month – Oh! And how I will remember that day from here after with such fondness! – while enjoying frittering away my day, on the newest virtual gadget of social-networking – Facebook, lo and behold! What message should appear but a simple “I know you”? And, my dear reader, as you no doubt realize, though his hair was shorter --- requisite mullet now a thing of his glorious past! --- and his temples colored by wisps of grey only men sport with such quiet dignity, I “knew” him too. It was BF – just a notable, and perhaps only twice as wry as he had been in his glory days, but the exact BF (in familiar confident spirit if not teenage body) nonetheless. In less than two hours, he and I had established a mutual love of writing, our definitive passion for learning, and the need we both felt to find a “reader” (indeed a “friend”) outside the hallowed halls in which we now found ourselves age’d and imprisoned: I in a world of patriarchal and passionless academia, and he in the soul-sucking world of a barrister.

What we learned was that each had taken a circuitous route to professional success, and yet neither of us had encountered that oft dream’d of font of complete creative nourishment. By week two of continual email, chatting, and Facebooking, we had laid bare our souls, shared secret and sacred writing, and each had found in the other a writerly soul-mate. An old friendship – one that had failed, two decades before, to evolve past that of a one-act-play -- suddenly found itself blossoming into a multi-dimensional opera… it seems that age and time had left us both ready for something more fulfilling – something rich and increasingly robust with creative potential.

We have each become, if only in this virtual world we have created [a modern world where photos replace afternoon meetings and a single email has more power than a dozen phone calls ever could] equal parts sounding board, sponsor, and spiritual guide for the other. The smallest snippet of dialogue continues to reveal intersections that stun us both. Music, humor, books – we found common ground in each subsequent detail we share with the other. Today we have forged a friendship based on intellectual inquiry and mutual admiration… How unique! How refreshing! To find a kindred spirit at such a point in my life...

But, you may ask, what of the future? Admittedly, ours remains a fragile bond. But, unlike those transient friendships of adulthood [which so rarely have the time to broach the difficult subjects: the stories of childhood, the angst of awkward adolescence, and the tragedies of growing older], ours is a bond that is based on an inexplicable common awareness of how far the other really has come in this complex and fucked up world. We are both eons away from that small East Texas town in which this foundation for kinship was first laid, and yet -- there is where, in some small measure, the kinship was formed. Yes, I believe that we grow stronger with each new personal reveal (twenty years of life has passed and must be reclaimed!) – we solidify what a simple message began with each new story we tell – each silent and solitary chuckle (he on his side of the country and I on mine) – each inside-joke one sends to the other builds a new link in a chain that links us willingly to one another. It has been -- fast. Fulfilling. Fabulous.

Mayhap it is coincidence, or, better yet -- do we look to fate or karma? No matter! ---- if any of these be the case, ---- pray, Sir, my BF, what have either you or I to do with it? Dare we question (if even in quiet appreciation!) what the gods have laid out before us? Friends, especially those possessing even an ounce of self-deprecating humor and wry intelligence, are few and far between. I cherish this one and wait -- breathless. What creative trails might we blaze together?

In the Cause!

Dr. T. Shandy

29 March 2009

I Which I Make a Charge and Abuse my Captive Audience

IN THE BEGINNING of this blog, I inform'd you that I was born under a cloud of parental subjectivity and genetic misfortune; -- but I did not inform you exactly how. No; that particular detail I will reserve entirely for a blog of its own; -- besides, kind reader, as you and I are in a manner perfect strangers, you must surely realize that it would not have been proper were I to share too many stories of myself all at once. -- You must have a little patience with me, novice blogger and lusty picaroon that I am.

I have undertaken, you see, to write not only my life in this blog, but to test my opinions also; hoping that your slow and gentle knowledge of my character, and of what kind of a mortal I am (vis-à-vis these pages), each by the other, would give you a better understanding of the first: as you read further about me and my often faulty and illogical opinions, I expect that the slight public acquaintance, which is now blooming betwixt us, will grow into familiarity (and, we dare to hope, might be lacking all contempt!); and that, unless one of us is in fault (see post, 28 March, for examples one should avoid), will terminate in friendship. ---- O, diem præ-clarum! ---- then, I know that you, and you alone, will find nothing which has touched my life trifling in its nature, or tedious in its telling. When else does a young academic find herself with such a willing and captive audience? Oh, to finally be able to reveal myself in the very manner I always knew would show its truth in the most realistic light! Would that I had discovered blogging long ago…

Therefore, my dear friend, and newly claimed virtual companion, if you think me somewhat thrifty with my personal narrative during our initial contacts, -- bear with me, -- and let me go on and tell my story my own way: ---- or, if I digress now and then from this blog’s stated purpose, ---- or should sometimes put on a dunce’s cap (yes, complete with bell upon it!) for a moment or two as we pass along, -- please, do not leave me reader-less -- but rather, courteously know that I possess but slightly more wisdom than what appears on these humble pages; -- and as we press on, either laugh with me, or at me, or in short, do anything, react in whatever way feels most authentic to you ---- only keep your temper; and, if possible, enjoy this journey by my side.

In the Cause,

T. Shandy, Ph.D.




27 March 2009

Manipulating the Product: Genetics, Blogging, and the Power of Metadiscourse

I WISH, as I begin this new "blogging adventure," that either my father or my mother, or indeed both of them, as they were in consequence both equally responsible for the act that led to my conception, had thought for just a moment as they conceived me -- had they duly considered how much depended upon what they were then doing: that not only were they creating a rational being (one may hope), but that possibly this being's physical entire self: mental acuity, potential genius, and, yes, the very cast of her psyche (not to mention her future fortunes gained and lost) would depend on the ability of these two very human humans to raise her [yes, me], manipulate (out of necessity) decades of genetics, and somehow -- somehow -- not totally fuck up the entire "product" in the process.*

Had they sincerely weighed and considered all of these pressing and complex issues of child-rearing, and proceeded more cautiously in my upbringing, well, I am, today, convinced that I should have made a quite different impact on the world -- different, for example, than the PhD'd, middle-America, humanities professor I lay bare before you.

Believe me, good readers, this brand of discourse is not as bizarre a thing as many of you might think; we are all, I am duly persuaded, on a path to becoming our parents. And we hate it. Every minute. Oh, of course we deny any such "nonsense." But, as the old game of logic demands, "If you call a dog's tail a 'leg', how many legs does it have?" Naturally, we all long to scream "five" (if I say you are a liar, for example, well, then, you are a liar), but in truth, you cannot turn a tail into a leg by merely wishing it so. My own life is proof. Likewise, you cannot deny your lineage (nor it's unavoidable impact on you) by simply claiming it has had none. Blood will out. Or something like that.

Take my word... nine parts in ten of any woman's sense or nonsense, her vanities or neuroses, her joys and her sorrows -- indeed, her very successes and failures in this world depend upon this immovable genetic make-up; add to this the remaining one part made up of the different tracks and trains parental guidance lures us into, and well, you quite likely have a mess.

Yet, somehow, no matter how diminished or increased we find our circumstances from that of our parents at a similar age, we do not seem to ever escape youthful imprinting; we become our parents -- if only in reverse. Yes, those who *think* they have escaped this tragic fate, are, without exception, a walking mirror image of their parents. Of course, a "mirror image" is, by its very definition, wholly reliant on the original it mimics; it exists at all, because the original image made it so. Reaction against our parents, in my opinion, generally results in the same outcome as outright mimicry. Naturally, mimicry is more annoying, but you see my point.

Nevertheless, what is perhaps more disturbing, is that we repeat this process, I've outlined above, generation after generation. We procreate without so much as a second thought; and, by treading these same steps over and over again, we eventually beat down a road -- one that appears to be as even and as smooth as any downtown, asphalted surface. And, as we all know, once we do something often enough, the Devil himself is hard pressed to drive us from our chosen path.

I write all of this by way of introduction. Having spent a considerable amount of my life cloistered in the ivory tower of academia, now I seek a different education. I look for life -- for questions rather than answers; I crave a deeper understanding of my fellow humans -- of this fucked-up, mean, beautiful world in which we are all forced to live. I have finished my formal education, yet now I find that I thirst for my real education to begin.

In the meantime, I should make transparent (no pun intended) my belief that any journey which seeks a more complete understanding of the interconnectedness of all beings, must first begin with a smaller journey of self-awareness. To that end, I began this blog at the beginning. My beginning.

I was born. I live. I hate. I have loved. And I blame my parents for all of it. On nights when I find myself awake and alone, I often shudder silently in the darkness when I consider what foundation my parents have laid for the thousand weaknesses of my body and mind -- weaknesses which neither physician nor philosopher will ever set thoroughly to rights. Today, doctorate in hand, I look inward for the correction to the mental and physical maladies life has dealt me. This blog is step one.

In the Cause,

Dr. T. Shandy


*With apologies to my godfather, Larry Sterne; likewise to my namesake, the "original" Tristram Shandy, Gentleman.